REJECTION – Healing The Inner Man (Part 2)

 

Who has never been rejected in some way or another? I’m yet to meet 1 person who has had everything in their life go exactly how they had planned, how they wanted it and when they wanted it ever since they were born. I have had the amazing opportunity of experiencing rejection so many times, whether in the workplace, in the church and in relationships. Sadly some may even experience this in families. Countless times, I have gone through this but the best part of that experience was seeing myself coming out victorious and stronger each time! Me coming out victorious did not mean i was eventually accepted in those places again but it means somehow I learnt the art of accepting what is and gather strength to move on knowing that God was with me.

 

Rejection takes so many different forms but one thing that I have learnt in life is that we all at one point have to face rejection of some sort and that’s never a pleasant experience, but its how we handle the rejection that will determine whether or not we are going to survive it and come out at the top.

 

I never used to understand why I had to face rejection. Why did I have to go through this? After all I’m a good person, I’m nice to people, I’m very loving and hardworking so why do I have to face this horrible beast called rejection? I thought to myself. I remember the feeling I felt every time I experienced the wrath of this beast. I felt so cold, I struggled to sleep at night, so many questions but no one to answer them. I felt so ashamed, embarrassed and humiliated all because I was rejected. I remember some times I struggled to eat and I would lose so much weight, all of that because I got rejected. Sometimes I was so low in mood that I would shut the door and throw a pity party for myself and cry myself to sleep all because I felt rejected. 

 

Then one day I remember I was walking to work. I left my house feeling sad. I had my earphones on and I was listening to a song called ‘I Almost Let Go…but God kept me’ by Kurt Carr. In the middle of that journey to work, somehow I felt God telling me that, “your life is in my hands and not in people’s hands. Those people or those situations that you feel have not dealt well with you are also in my hands. They have no power to do anything unless you allow them to.”Mind you this is a time I had no personal relationship with God (God was someone i only went to when i was in trouble and when he got me out of that trouble i would REJECT him and put him to the side) but he favoured me enough to snatch my mind out of the jaws of the enemy. The enemy wanted to steal my joy, my peace and my life, as we all know, he comes to kill, steal and destroy (John 10:10). It was in that moment something snapped in me I literally felt a pop in my heart like a knot had been untied and I had an aha! moment. In that instance the pain and sadness I had vanished. I came to the realisation that God is the one who holds my life in his hands and he is the only one with the final say over anything concerning my life. Only he knows the plans that he has for me, plans to prosper me and not harm me. Plans to give me a hope and a future (Jeremiah 29:11).

 

listen here, we are dealing with an enemy that is an opportunist. He waits for those moments when we are at out lowest to attack our minds. when you feel rejected the devil starts whispering to you, ”see you are not good enough, you will never amount to anything, they didn’t pick you because they think you are stupid…” he will whisper all the negative things until you start believing it. The devil is not emotional he does not feel sorry for you, all he wants is to destroy you by taking that problem you have and magnify it to the point that that problem becomes you. When the problem becomes you, you hate yourself and when you hate yourself you then go into destructive mode on your own life while the devil takes a comfortable seat somewhere eating popcorn watching your life crumble. All because of what? Rejection?! I began to fight to get my mind back, and to practice discipline with my feelings and you know what I succeeded in my own way. I became very tough like a soldier. I was no longer afraid to walk away from any situation that threatened to take away my happiness or any situation i felt was toxic to me. This was soon to become a problem in itself as i became so hard hearted and so consumed in protecting myself that i didnt realise in the process i was bruising others that came into my life. I became very brutal with my words especially when people did something to hurt me. I made sure i would sting them with my words to the point that i myself would start feeling sorry for them because of the things i would have said. Yes to the world i was very justified for the words I used. I even had friends who would cheer me on and tell me, “well done for standing up for yourself, you are a strong black woman.” but to God my attitude stunk and my words were disgusting before him. The problem here was that i had created my OWN coping strategy that did not involve God in it.

 

It took me 1 day, 11 years ago when i was faced with another rejection situation, hehe this time it was a different beast, it came with horns, tails, fangs and all. It was a different kind. It was so scary i found myself sitting at the corner of my bed crying out to a God i did not have a personal relationship with, a God that i had neglected all my life. I remember a still small voice saying to me, “if you want me to change your life you have to stop what you are doing. He was referring to all the things (in my mind i thought were good) i used to do to defend myself, my attitude, my tongue, my behaviour, my actions, basically i had to die to self in order for me to live again. When i thought i was tough and getting it all done by myself, i was basically killing who God had called me to be. I surrendered, i had to surrender, i had no choice. I was faced with a beast that was too big for me but thank God for amazing grace and mercy that came and snatched me out of the pits of hell. The blood of Jesus that never loses power came to save me. God led me to a church where i got baptised and received the Lord as MINE. My salvation journey began.

 

As my walk with the Lord began, He started to reveal to me that all these times that i felt i was being rejected, he was literally saving my life and my purpose. Even though some of the chaos was self inflicted, He reminded me he was a God who causes ALL things to work together for good for those who love the Lord…(Romans 8:28) He knew what was ahead because he was already in my future, a future that i was only yet to discover. God started walking me through each situation step by step and case by case from when i started feeling the sting of rejection. When i was rejected after numerous job interviews, God showed me that those jobs where not meant for me so he gave me a job without an interview, the panel that was meant to interview me greeted me, showed me around and asked me when i could start the job. I had Free accommodation for a few months and gifts from harrods every Christmas lol! (I just thought i would throw that in there lol!). For the rejection i faced in church, God said to me, one day when i went for my morning jog,” that was not rejection, i simply allowed it because its time for you to start worshipping me for who I’m and not what i have done for you. Worship me and don’t worship your service to me.” As soon as i began to dig deeper on what he had told me my life began to change for the better. When i stopped worshipping pastors or other people with titles and genuinely seeking the heart of god, my life changed. If it was rejection in a relationship, which a lot of people struggle with today the Lord didn’t tell me this one, but He opened my eyes to see it clearly for myself. I realised all the relationships that i felt i was rejected, looking back now there was NO WAY those people where going to be able to handle the road or purpose that God had upon my life. I was only going to end up frustrated and lost if those relationships were successful. Don’t get me wrong these were not bad people at all but they were not meant to go the journey with me and i was not to walk with them in their journey either. I remembered the verse in 1 John 2:19They went out from us, but they did not really belong to us. For if they had belonged to us, they would have remained with us; but their going showed that none of them belonged to us. Its funny that as i continued to grow i realised that some were not even my ‘type’ at all lol!   I found myself thinking, if only i had known that God had this amazing plan for me, to prosper me, to give me a hope and a beautiful future (jeremiah 29: 10), I would never have wasted my tears on any of these situations that i viewed as rejection. But again if i had known, i would not have learnt the lessons i have learnt now and would not have needed God the way i do now.

 

So my message to you is, it is important to understand and believe that if God knew you before he formed you in your mothers womb (Jeremiah 1:5), then be rest assured that he knows the beautiful future he has for you. For you to reach that destination that God has set for you, you have to go through some obstacle courses and those courses will involve you being rejected in certain situations or places. There will be some detours in life but if you stay strong and never give up you will win the race and reach the finish line. If you just become STILL and know that Jesus is the Lord of your life and he is in control of everything, you will come out victorious. Just remember that what you see as rejection with your human eye it is actually God’s protection and elevation!

You are fearfully and wonderfully made by God. You were created in his image and you are the apple of his eye. So no amount of rejection from anyone should make you feel like you are worth nothing. You are a child of a King and that King will never reject you. He holds your life in his hands!

Be Still

 

 

 

Tsitsi

@youcanriseagain

 

 

Surviving False Accusations: Healing the Inner Man (part 1)

One of the most difficult things a person may have to deal with at some point in their life is a false accusation. I have struggled to handle this issue for a very long time even when I had received Christ as my personal Lord and savior. God knows I have had my fair share of these in my life and its one of those things that made me beyond angry. I’m sure a lot of people have had to endure the pain this brings and can relate. This can happen anywhere and to anyone but the saddest thing is sometimes it can happen in the house of God, in families and even in close relationships.

 

Dealing with a false accusation can be very challenging because as we all know lies spread faster than truth. Sometimes you find yourself trying to defend or explain yourself to so many people out of desperation to prove your innocence. One thing that God has taught me over the years since my salvation journey with him started is, when I’m faced with a ‘difficult to contain situation‘, i have to be still, quiet and fix my eyes on the one who knows the truth, the one who is TRUTH, Jesus. For nothing under the sun is hidden from him. At first my response to God would be, ”how can I keep quiet, I didn’t do anything God! You know I didn’t do anything! I have to say something God. Look, they keep telling lies, they are not stopping!”. I thought it would Be better for me to say something and stand up for myself because i was afraid God would not do a good job at defending me. After all if i said or did something its quickly done and dusted, i get my own pound of flesh, i get my satisfaction and can move on with my life, right? Wrong! I failed to realise that God knew all the intricate details of the story, he sees everything and he is everywhere. He was there when that person/people were conspiring against me and i wasn’t. So is it not better for the one who was there and heard everything to fight for me than for me to fight for myself? I asked myself. The more I tried to speak the worse the situation got. This is when I remembered the verse (prov 13:3 He who keeps his mouth keeps his life).I realised that this battle was too big for me and I was not going to be able to run around and tell everyone of my innocence. I was not going to win this if i stood on my own and leaned on my own understanding. So in that excruciating pain I was in, I got out of God’s way and chose to trust Him to fight for me. I surrendered my battle to him. I listened to his instruction to be quiet and be still but in my bleeding heart I would always pray psalm 109, “do not be silent, oh God of my praise, for the mouths of the wicked and the mouths of the deceitful have opened up against me…!’’ He replied, ““The Lord will fight for you, and you shall hold your peace.” (Exodus 14:14). I started practicing discipline in the midst of that chaos; boy oh boy did God start fighting for me. God showed up for me in such a way that it left my jaw on the floor. The truth will always come to light even if it takes years; truth always prevails in the end. The Truth will always outshine the lies just like how light consumes the darkness.

 Understanding The Other Side

I have often wondered what exactly will be going on in someone’s mind for them to utter lies or false accusations against someone? Then I read the word of God, Revelations 12 describes the devil as the accuser of brethren and he accuses people day and night. He is the master of all lies. So wherever, whenever there is lies told, the devil is also present with his wife, kids, cousins and descendants. So this verse has helped me to understand that when people accuse you falsely they have allowed themselves to be used by the devil and allowed themselves to be part of that family i have mentioned above. When people feel the need to falsely accuse someone, this is an indication that the spirit of God is not in them (prov 12:22 lying lips are an abomination to the Lord… Psalm 101:7 No one who practices deceit will dwell in my house and no one who speaks falsely /tells lies will stand in my presence)

 

I have also come to the understanding that when a person makes a false accusation or manufactures lies to get their own way, the problem is with them and not the accused. People do this for a lot of reasons and mostly selfish ones (this is excluding those that are tortured into telling lies of course), jealousy, inferiority complex, something lacking in that person’s life, so they fill that inflicting pain on another will make them appear good or helps them to feel better and happier about themselves. Some are just consumed with anger and hatred and cannot control themselves.  All of this usually stems from wounded souls, spiritual scars that have not been properly dressed, past trauma, broken hearts, hopelessness, anger and bitterness. Whatever their reasons may be just know that the problem is not you but them and until they decide to deal with their inner issues, they will continue to hurt others.

 

My message for you today is if you are facing this situation today just know that there are so many people who have gone through the same situation you are in right now, some more than others, but they survived. If they survived this, so can you. (1 Peter 5:9…Standing firm in faith, because you know that the family of believers throughout the world is undergoing the same kind of sufferings….)but God promises to restore you, make you strong, firm and steadfast. Stop carrying the burden of anger, resentment and guilt over something that was done by someone else. Set yourself free. Holding on to what someone else did to you will stop you from moving forward, it stops you from flourishing and you run the risk of ending up in the same position as your accuser; angry, bitter and you can begin to hurt others as well if you let it consume you. Allow God to deal with it. When God deals with it, he does it so perfectly that you will never have to revisit that issue again.

Have a Forgiving Heart

Forgiveness can be one of the most difficult things to do but it is necessary in the healing process. Holding on to hurt and holding grudges hinders your healing greatly. It hurts you more than the person who did the hurting. Let it go, give it to God and move on.

Matthew 6:14-15 For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.

Be The Peace Maker

Where possible, be the bigger person, try to talk it out with your accuser, pursue peace. If the other person does not want to talk it out, its still ok. Every case is different. Some you just got to love from a distance but make sure your heart is at peace and right before God. Ask God to create in you a clean heart (psalm 51:10)

Romans 12:18-21

If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.  Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,”says the Lord.

As hard as it maybe, let it go! Give it to God. Give your heart a chance to heal.

Tsitsi

@youcanriseagain

YOU SURVIVED!

Look at all the things you have been through in your life. Since the day of your birth to this day, you have been through some crushing seasons. Some seasons have been so dark that you wondered if you were going to come out alive, but you fought for your life. Some trials almost made you lose your mind but you fought to get your mind back. Some battles left you feeling all alone but Jesus was there to be that very present friend to lean on. Some wars you fought left you with a limp but you still got up and kept going.

Don’t you see how strong you are? Can’t you see you are a fighter?

I’m here to tell you, though you came out with bruises and scars, well done soldier, well done warrior

  1. you made it through that anxiety and panic attack.
  2. You stayed strong through that challenging battle.
  3. You fought a good fight even when the odds were against you.
  4. You survived that depression that almost took you out.
  5. You kept it together even though inside you were falling apart.

Look at you, you look so beautiful, so fresh, so strong, so full of life. You survived it all and Praise God you do not look like what you have been through!

▪️You are more than and conqueror (Romans 8:37)

▪️You can do all things through Christ who strengthens you (Philippians 4:13)

▪️Well done good and faithful servant (Matthew 25:21-23)

Tsitsi

@youcanriseagain

The Secret Place

I asked a few people what they thought when they hear the phrase The Secret Place. I got different answers some said they thought about a Cave, some thought an address that nobody else knows about, 

and some said a hiding place or room. All answers, though different had something in common they were talking about a hidden and personal space that no one else knows about.

 

I have realised that this secret place does not always have to be an environment but it can also be a mindset. I have found out that I can actually zone out of the environment that I’m in even when there is a lot of people around me. I can be in my on space in a place full of people. I can be in my own secret place where no else one knows what I’m thinking about, what I’m seeing or looking at, no one knows what secrets I’m keeping deep inside. It is my secret place

 

I go through periods in my life where I just want to come out of the world spend time with God and equip myself to go back into the world. When I’m in my secret place, 

I switch off and just focus on my 

personal relationship with God. It is in that place I ask God questions, I seek direction, I repent, I wage war on the devil, and I break, bind, rebuke, renounce and denounce in that secret place. I sweat bullets in my secret place. I cry, I groan deeply and sometimes I argue with God because Iwant him to accept my will instead of his. I try to reason with God; I roll on the floor in my secret place. I’m also silent at times in my secret place, listening to what God is saying and if I don’t hear anything I just lift my hands and Worship. I can safely say there is a lot of craziness that happens in this space of mine, a lot that a person from the outside will never understand and only God can. There is a lot of rearranging that takes place, a lot of deep cleaning of this soul of mine when I’m in my secret place. Im undeniably in my raw-rest form when I’m in my secret place. I’m myself, I’m vulnerable, and I’m a child.

 

Then something different happens when I come out from my hiding place. Im stronger, lighter, happier, composed and rejuvenated. I’m refilled; I’m comforted and beautifully broken. Oh how I love spending time in that secret place. I’m always changed when I spend time in the presence of the almighty that is why I call it my secret place.

 

Find your special secret place and spend time with your creator and he will reveal to you wonderful, marvelous and hidden things that you know nothing about. (Jeremiah 33:3)

 

 

Tsitsi 

 

@youcanriseagain

PEACE IN THE MIDST OF CHAOS!

 As I was walking through the woods, I could not help but feel the peace that came out of nature.  The very tall trees just stood still not being moved by all the activity that was going on around them. There’s probably some snakes sliding underneath the grass or some creepy crawlies moving around. So many things happen in the woods especially when it’s dark. Foxes and other scary animals come out and night but when the light comes out in the morning, everything becomes still.  And the scary animals hide away. How can there be this kind of peace in a place where so much activity takes place especially at night? I thought to myself.

 

So this got me thinking, most of us who have been around long enough can agree with me that this journey called life is not an easy one. We face so many challenges and obstacles; some small, some so big that they knock us down to our knees. Some trials make us feel like losing hope; some give us a lot of anxiety and sleepless nights.  These trials usually present themselves in different shapes and forms and they often show up when we least expect. They usually catch us by surprise. 

 

In spite of all these things that we go through in life, there is 1 thing that I found to be true, the special Light that when it comes out and invades the darkest nights of our lives it brings peace in the midst of whatever wars we may be facing. Jesus Christ is that Light. Trust me when I say I was never one that believed Jesus could give me that kind of peace. To me Jesus was one of those people that I would always go to when I was in trouble and when my problem is gone I forget about him.  I can safely say I used Jesus only for my benefit.

 

Things changed for me when I received Christ over 10years ago. Salvation came and my whole life changed. The way I see trials and challenges has changed and my whole outlook on life has been transformed.  Don’t get me wrong this does not mean that when I face these trials I’m all happy and I don’t feel any pain, but I know this truth that having Jesus in my life and accepting him as my personal Lord and Saviour has given me a certain comfort that I can never find anywhere. It has given me a certain hope that the world can never give me. It has made me see God in every storm that I have experienced and given me a certain peace that this world cannot offer. There is a certain strength to carry on that comes with having Jesus by your side. I have learnt that with God we will walk through some difficult valleys but he always gives us the grace to go through them if we receive the light that he brings. It is also in these seasons that God moulds us, he multiplies us and deliverance takes place inside of us. 

 

One important lesson that I have taken in most of the storms that I have gone through is that, we go through storms to be moulded, healed and delivered but above all we overcome so that we can reach out to other peoplewho are broken and hurting. I always say, ‘’if you have not gone through some tough stuff in your life or experienced some difficult situations and overcame then who can you encourage, reach out to or comfort. Experience is what develops in us certain compassion and sensitivity towards others and it develops humility in us and because we overcame our own storms we are now equipped to lift up the other person who may be facing a difficult storm.

 

When I look back at the storms that I have faced and overcame I can only see God. He gave me the grace to get out of the house and not look like what I was going through, he still dressed me up with a smile on my face. He sustained my mind when I could have lost it and I cannot help but thank him for giving me PEACE in the midst of my CHAOS. 

 

Ask Jesus to walk with you and you will never regret it.

Tsitsi

@youcanriseagain

Evening Primrose

One of my favourite supplements is Evening Primrose. I have been using this for a while now and the change it has brought to my life is amazing. It has helped with balancing my hormones and eliminating some of the unpleasant hormonal symptoms i used to experience. You can purchase this product from Holland and Barett and if you are in Harare Zimbabwe you can purchase from The Health Shop, Health and All, located in Kwame Nkrumah Ave in Harare Zimbabwe 🇿🇼 .

Be the first to break the CYCLE by stepping out of the CIRCLE!

I’m sure many of us have gone through this at some point in our lives, Cycles. When you feel like everything you are going through is deja vu. Going through the same unpleasant experiences over and over again and the hardest thing about it is not knowing how to stop it. We often wonder why we keep experiencing the same thing year in and year out. For some it has gotten so bad that you can even predict the time it is going to happen because you are so used to the cycles.

Sometimes we can see the recurring patterns in our families in the form of hereditary diseases, job losses, abortion of plans, premature termination of dreams, premature deaths etc. These can be very heartbreaking and a great torment to one’s spirit as you end up feeling like nothing is ever going to change. When we are born and as we go through life in this world, we pick up so many things along the way and therefore we need to be cleansed by the blood of Jesus daily to remove the stains that are placed on our spirits by experiences of life.

 

As children of God we need to understand that Jesus came so that we might have life and have it to its’ fullest. (Gal 3:13). We need to realize and begin to exercise the power that was given to us. (Luke 10:19 Behold I have given you power to tread upon serpents and scorpions, and over all the power of the enemy). Christ redeemed us from the curse of the law by becoming the curse himself… Jesus’s death on the cross was not for a specific group of challenges but his death came about to conquer all challenges and to deliver everyone. By his death and resurrection we were given power to fight against any kind of challenge we might face. We have been given the power to break generational curses by simply stepping out of the circle in the name of Jesus Christ. When you choose to allow Jesus to take control of your life, there is a breaking of chains that begins to happen because when Jesus steps into a place, demons tremble and flee, darkness cannot stand him because he is the Light. Nothing remains the same when Jesus occupies your heart. Chains are broken, healing and deliverance takes place. It is only by the power in the name of Jesus we are set free from any demonic oppression.

By choosing to invite Jesus into your heart you are bringing freedom to yourself, your family, your children, your children’s children and generations to come. The question is are you ready to make a change? Are you willing to be the first to break the cycle by stepping out of the circle?

Tsitsi

insta:@youcanriseagain

FB: You Can Rise Again